In anticipation.. or issit pre-emption?

I came by for a night's stay. I informed my future dad-in-law about it on Fri, but was asking myself earlier this afternoon if I should give my future parents-in-law a call to let them know I'd be having lessons and would reach late. I decided not to, thinking it's time to get used to having this place as my new home, and to give the message to PILs that I'd be part of the family. I won't want to keep on reporting my movements or inform my family when I would be home and when not - that is what I deem a total lack of freedom.

So, I came over after school, to find the big door tightly locked! Even though I could get past the front gate, I couldn't get into the house. All other side doors were locked securely (it's a good thing) too. I shouted at my PIL's window: "Auntie", "Uncle" for a number of times, but it seemed their TV volume was blasting disco music. I called their house number to find it engaged. I called FIL's mobile number to find it turned off. Not a surprise. I toggled with WW's car switch so that there were the beep beep sounds, but apparently it sounded too far away for their notice. I rang the doorbell, no one came to the door. Summer barked, no one could hear (although I suspected the neighbours could). How pissed was I! In the end I called Wanyi (WW's sis) on her mobile phone and glad enough, she picked up and helped me open the door. NOW I DEMAND MY SET OF KEYS! (And perhaps some little consideration.)

So you can't blame me for worrying. About what my life will be like living with in-laws. I have no qualms about them at all; they're very friendly folks who make me feel at ease and take good care of me. I worry coz I know myself well enough. I like freedom too much, and adore the feeling of having control. Sometimes it saddens me knowing I have no say in how I want the common furniture to be arranged, or how I want my things to be placed in the common places (e.g. my shoes in the shoe cabinet). It's not that my new family members do not allow me so, but the resistant me just don't feel comfortable infringing on space not my own. I like ownership and sometimes would like to declare something as my own (and as WW's, but just for the two of us). But I know I won't have our own house, I won't have my own car, which means I will have obligations (for using things that are not my own).

But now I look at the positive side. With less ownership, I will have less obligation - financially. WW and I still have a space belonging to just the two of us - the bedroom and adjourning study room. We have our say on how we want it designed and on the furniture pieces. I know for sure I have WW's support in the things I do, and that will be a strong factor in making living together manageable and harmonious. Furthermore, I will be spared the housecleaning coz they have a maid. And I suppose living as a big family will help build up strong ties, be it between the family members or between spouses.

On the other hand, I'll definitely miss my Wong Tian and Apa, Ama, Shou Bi and Fluff. Boohoo :_(
Typing this makes me wanna cry oreadi. Boohoo :_(

It may seem like I worry a lot. These feelings and emotions come to me early, and they leave in due time. It's always better to pre-empt what is to come so that I can manage better and get an internal conviction early. Then I'll be all-ready to face the world.