Chase my thoughts, if you are able to keep up

What would you think of a person who keeps a daily expenses record, as well as a diary updated weekly? Or perhaps an excel sheet to record foreseen future expenses so that the full financial balances are clearly articulated?

What is a woman without emotions, especially those that swing in a manner similar to a roller-coaster ride? Who would have known that a female's hormones can affect so much of her thinking and feelings, evoking seemingly irrational and insensible conjunctions of the mind? Would a woman, usually more logical than emotional, opt for the male's way of thinking and devoid herself of such unwarranted conclusions chucked out by the insecure mind?

All females like chocolate, cakes, or ice-cream, isn't it? Why do they not hold any appeal to any lady then? Sometimes I really think I place tight controls on myself. No chocolates, no cakes, no ice-cream, till a point when I no longer crave for them. Why not give me an apple instead? I go ga-ga over chocolate fondue more for the idea and freedom it offers instead of the satisfaction from the taste of hot melting chocolate in your mouth tickling your taste buds. What freedom in chocolate fondue? Well, you get to choose which fruits or marshmallow you want to dip, and in which kind of chocolate - dark, milk or white. Am I enjoying myself with my cravings for healthy food? Well, should be, since I feel the sweetness of my apple is comparable to that of chocolate, or at least I think so.

HDB or private housing? No answer yet. If both choices are achievable, how so for private housing? An even further answer awaits. That also boils down to the feeling of envy seeing other ladies proudly presenting their black Ladies' Card for swiping, yet there's only the plain greyish debit card lying in my wallet. UxB is good coz they know how to thrive their business by working on females' weakest point - envy cum jealousy. We just don't want to lose out to any others! You have Ladies, I shall aim for Black. You have Black, I'll get that Platinum and just you wait and see.

Anytime in the day is never the same as 1-3am in the early morning. Don't blame me for the uninteresting posts; mostly I am not given the right timing. And then again, t-1 (in hours and in exchange clearing and settlement terms) was supposedly the intended sleeping time. No wonder I look like a panda. The knowledge of having insufficient sleep stresses me out. I don't know if this fear is derived out of concern for my body, or out of my own expectations of having enough sleep everyday. Sounds like a freaky perfectionist, huh?

In some aspects, commitment, obligation and expectation have the same connotation. No wonder there are many who are commitment-phobia, especially the guys, who are expected to carry on their shoulder greater loads of burden. To me, these three terms may mean lack of personal freedom and choice in some instances, which my independent heart finds very difficult to accept at times. Similarly, I wish not to impose any pressure on anyone at all to have to fulfill my expectations.

I'm hungry and sleepy. Will I ever get the chance to lead the carefree life of 3am-sleeping-time and 9am-waking-time again?