Sneak previews

Revealing...

.. photos taken by my make-up artist Sharon Tan during photo shoot yesterday. Actual studio and outdoor shoots will be ready in a month's time or so, currently under our photographer Benny Ang's fine editing.

With lovely Cymbidium orchids in hair
This is going to be the sweet simple hairdo to go with my wedding gown.
I'm willing to show only a picture of my evening gown for now, as likely I won't be wearing it for our lunch reception but only to our dinner banquet (where only relatives and perhaps my jiemeis will attend).The many months of mane-keeping has not gone to waste.
Sharon was so proud of her works that she requested me to pose for these photos.

That's all for viewing!

Witness the transformation

View from the Flyer, 24 May 2008

Anticipating the rise of a new empire - the Integrated Resort and the Marina Bay Gardens.

Quiz

Personality quiz taken from this link. Pretty accurate. (Tks Jun for promoting the link!)

---

Your view on yourself:

You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:

You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

Breathing in the air of freedom

Since last Thu, I have been released from work and have enjoyed my days tremendously. Last Thu and Fri saw me studying hard for the Maths prep exam on Sat. After the exam I went home to pack some stuff to bring over to WW's place (for the gradual move-in) and waited for WW to come over after his work to pick me up for dinner together. WW and I spent Sunday with his family, including his elder sis, hubby and baby who went over. We also had Sunday dinner with my family, all members present. We are going to treasure this regular Sunday dinner very much, especially when I'll be moving to my new home come Jan.

With this newfound freedom at hand, I'll be catching up on my yoga sessions since I've skipped three weeks of them while busy attending Maths prep lessons. This morning I checked out the flagship Absolute Yoga studio at River Valley Point and courageously attended the session conducted in Japanese. I thought "Jap Hot C" meant a new series of Japanese-style yoga, but who would have guessed that it's an entire class of Japanese students with a Japanese instructor and lesson conducted in Japanese! Good thing the poses were not new and I could secretly blend into the class. Most of the students were married (ok, I admit I go around observing the wedding band on people's finger), probably tai-tais of the wealthy Japanese men who moved to Singapore. What good lives!

Tomorrow - my first ever facial in my life!

Lovely gift from a dear friend

Thank you my dear friend, for the lovely gift for our ROM - a blanket knitted with our names. It was indeed a special gift that is filled with so much warmth. Much appreciated! :)

Mer-mer and Me

When we first saw her at the pet shop, she was a messy ball of fur with slightly pitiable eyes. In comparison, the tear-drop-eyed beagle in the adjacent cage looked more adorable. Good thing (WW’s sis) saw the beauty in the fur ball and brought her home after she successfully raised sufficient money. The shop owner named her “Winter”, but we thought it was too cold a name and I suggested “Summer”. From then on, she is living in that bright and sunny name, sometimes also in various variations such as Mer-mer.

Those days when WW and family used to live temporarily in Hillside Drive, Mer-mer had to sleep in the foyer, in a moist condition given the lack of direct sunlight and plants growing at the side. Weeks after she arrived, her skin got very bad with worms eating it away. WW and sis brought her to the vet, who suggested she be put to sleep. But hey, she’s such a lovely cute puppy, how could we bear to do this to her?

It was a fortunate thing WW’s family moved soon after, to their new house which presented a much better living condition for Mer. She’s now running around the foyer most of the time, if she’s not in the cage. We will often let her into the house too.

---

Mer is like a mischievous little kid, running around and swerving away from you every time you try to catch her. When WW parks his car outside the house, Mer will stick her head out between the gate grills and wait patiently for us to step into the foyer. I always laugh at her and her funny actions – she does this leap like she’s flying in mid-air when hopping out of the main door to the foyer. And secretly I think she likes us to laugh at her.

She’s also a smart dog, picking up words and expressions rather quickly. (That’s why she loves me so much!) A stern “No” from WW’s dad would send her flying out of the living room, and she can even retract back into her own cage when instructed a “cage cage”. There was once I said “walk walk” to her, but went upstairs to get some stuff and left her in the living room. She was so anxious that she started whining and barking rather furiously, which was quite a rare thing. WW and I were laughing our bellies out at her. And clever of Mer to not do the same when WW tries to cheat her. She was indifferent to WW’s suggestions of a walk – so clever to see through WW.

The lovely one

Some songs simply mean so much

Like New Radical’s You Get What You Give, which reminds me of the JC days spent with my fellow HnF provisional instructors – Chris, WT & Tian – hanging around in the school gym and doing our schoolwork in the study rooms. Then there’s Savage Garden’s To the Moon and Back, which brings me back to those secondary school ice-skating days with Zhou Yun and Xin. And with Martika’s Toy Soldiers, I get teleported to the VJC canteen table, listening to Stephie’s dating stories before the start of our lessons.

M2M’s Pretty Boy brings back memorable times with RH orientation folks. We were young and silly, willing to follow the regime set up by our RH seniors. I still remember that photo taken with Joan and Sher in our silly Rag Day costume.

Michelle Branch’s The Game of Love, with Santana lending the base, brings a smile to my face as that first date at the pool / billiard outlet with WW seems like only yesterday again.

Songs are so amazing. They connect our souls and entrench our memories in the various phases of our lives, forever.

Busy busy week!

It’s gonna be a busy week ahead, leading to the big event of our lives!

Wed it’s going to be fun with the gers – dinner and drinks. NO SABO PLS! I need a week to recover from excessive alcohol dosage!

Thu it’s going to be lotsa running around, from buying wedding shoes at Sixth Ave (cool huh, next time I’ll use my bungalow as my home-base bakery), to collecting marriage certificate at ROM, to appointment with my lovely bridal gown designer, and lastly to the accommodative neighbourhood florist to check out her range of flowers.

Fri I still need to work half-day (good thing it’s Friday!). Will then meet Tian for nails pampering (manicure & pedicure), then to check out facial packages. You won’t believe I’ve never done a facial before. I don’t even want to start, but, this is one of the many sacrifices of a bride-to-be. Friday evening I’ll collect my hand bouquet for use during the actual solemnization on Sat morning.

Hope everything’s prepared. So many things in preparation for solemnization; can you imagine how the customary and actual day will be like? Good thing we ladies know how to soak in the happiness of this busy-ness!

真虚伪

It feels demoralising every time I complete my appraisal with my sup. It’s obvious we judge work differently and I feel it’s no point doing my own grading. The outcome will be as expected. Last year, although assessed by the same sup, I had a second-level sup who recognises my work (not that the direct doesn’t, but it just isn’t reflected at all on paper) and pushes for my ranking. This year, I’m not so sure. Furthermore, I will not be of value to the team anymore since I’ll be going on my study break.

Again, I’m reminded of the fact that you have to be wa-yang, yaya at work. It no longer suffices to deliver good result, but you need to be damn proud of it and announce to the whole wide world. It’s so faked.

So, shall I put on my mighty cynical hat and hone my politicking skills during the next one year?

真虚伪

Gathering @ Feng's house

We had a cosy gathering at Feng & Jason's house to celebrate Feng's bday and to chill out with some karaoke and mahjong. It was Jun's exact birthday but she was in Perth with her dear Michael. They must be happily spending time together. =) Ivan missed out the fun, but hope his tummy is okay by now!

Their hyper friendly terrier - Scruffy. She jumps onto everything - the sofa, the cushions, and us.Happy birthday Feng! One more year older!

WW adores Scruffy for she lets him flip her over without struggling.
Scruffy's busy licking away at my palm
Mr Lock & Wong Tian. Sweet little pair.

---

A little more than a week to go. I'm excited!

Divine Yoga

This feeling is really different.

Even before the benefits of the entire yoga session are reaped, the serenity and peace of it have being felt.

When I shut out those noisy thoughts, concentrate on achieving balance and strength, and immense myself in the tranquility, my mind would go back to those young and carefree days. It was as if the time clock turned back and that the secondary school days were back. The sounds of activity outside that little quaint shop-house room became crisp and clear. The comfortable heat of the sun moderated the coldness from my earlier hours in the office. I was at peace with myself, and in that moment, felt myself lift out of the numbness of the lifestyle you call working.

That explains why I have been going for regular lunch-time yoga, once a week. This special moment of being with oneself erases the hectic two-hour rush. It is elating knowing there are more such moments to come – the relish of regained freedom.

How will it be like?

Feeling lethargic these days, having slept less from the online research I’ve been doing during the nights. There’s just so much to prepare and the vast pool of information online just makes the choosing process more tedious. Not that I’m complaining though, I like looking through beautiful and sweet stuff and to soak in people’s happiness.

As the day when we’ll swear our vows to each other approaches, I’m asking myself more and more of the fundamental questions. In some ways, we’re not a pair of sticky couple who need to be with the other every other day, since we both need our personal space now and then. Thus seeing each other everyday would be a major change for both of us. Although I won’t be moving in till the customary seven months later, the idea of having to blend with each other’s lifestyle has already hit on me. Especially, when I have to live with the in-laws. I suppose no one, other than another in the same situation, would ever know understand how this experience would be. Well, sometimes I wish I don’t have to think so far. Seems like I badly need the marriage preparation course.

Thank you mama papa tian & ww!

Did my trial make-up with my wedding make-up artist at home tonight. Wong Tian rushed work to come back earlier; WW dropped by despite his busy work and fatigue; Mama being the enthusiastic and beauty critic for me - I'm touched and happy to have my loved ones showing their concern for me and my wedding preps. And Papa, who usually is quite bochap about beauty and the like, popped in and took a look.

=)

累

I feel tired worrying for him, wondering what is happening now and if things are fine. He must be too tired to drop me a note and may not realise I'm worrying for him. Sometimes I wish I could receive an sms or two of the positive progress rather than just the bad news.

从不知道为个人担忧也会是种累。

30 days!

30 more days! The ticker has ceased counting in terms of months and it was quite a shock seeing the count down in terms of days.

Excited to think of the big commitment both WW and I are going to make to each other 30 days later. Wonder if the man is feeling the anxiety. And will I, the freedom-loving soul, fantasize of being a runaway bride on the big day? Okay, maybe not that exaggerated, but I’ll definitely feel some cold feet, as much as I look forward to the special day.

I’ve got to remind WW how soon our ROM date is now. I honestly hope he is fully and mentally prepared!

Family outing @ Henderson Waves

It has been a joyous weekend, well-spent with WW and our families.

This morning we went on an early visit to 光明山 temple with WW and his family. I really have the Buddhas to thank. We then had breakfast at Bukit Timah food centre.

This afternoon my whole family and WW explored the newly-opened Henderson Waves, Hilltop Walk and Mount Faber Walk. The sun was still splendidly hot at 5ish pm, but we had a great time still and enjoyed the sunset on our way back. Next Sat we all are heading to Singapore Flyer, credits to Mama who won the tickets!

The Wong Family

So happy to have WW with us!
Me and WW on the Henderson Wave bridge
Look at Shou Bi's long and flowing hair!
Looking ahead
View from the bridge. Is it a good thing that they did away with see-through floors?


Shou Bi and WW posing away, waiting for me to capture the previous two artistic shots. Wahaha
Wong Tian and me
At Jewel Box.
Dinner at Siglap's 福林酿豆腐
Yippie

The Nan Ren's house

The beautiful fountain which gives soothing water flow sounds that can be heard from WW's room.
Lovely Summer the Westie
Sneaky little one quenching its thirst at the fountainEying her favourite food - apple

Wahaha

The sunset view at the balcony
The table, benches and chairs were WW's gifts to his family, especially to his mother as Mothers' Day gift. And I paid half the amount!

No easy task choosing a gown that pleases us both!

Last Friday's tea session with the scholar potentials proved very fruitful. Their confidence rubbed onto me, which resulted in the spurt of warm air around me for the few days into the weekend.

Some of the candidates appeared to be different from what I expected from their CVs. But the two outstanding ones still shone through as promised. And I must say, the one really stood above all with her skills and experience, accomplished parallel to that of a wise adult.

During the weekend WW went with me for bridal gowns trial. I have been doing my research online and had my eyes fixed on just this one Bridal Studio - Margaret Brides - and wasted no time physically checking out others. The first visit on Sat gave us an idea of the types of wedding gowns she provides and the second visit with WW, Tian and her beau gave us a few designs to choose from. I was initially perplexed having to decide between the designs I like and the ones WW fancies. Now we haven't made the decision but I've come to a compromise since the Man has exquisitely fine taste. I trust he knows what is best for me!

I'm the Nationalist

It's interesting to read the application form write-ups by the young scholar potentials. They are so full of dreams that you feel somewhat more alive simply by reading their write-ups. Again, I'm amazed at how those of that nationality fight so hard, so aggressively, to make themselves stand out. The (irritating) long essays that span an additional two pages as compared to the other four-pages application forms. The extravagant written showcase of their starling academic performance. The fierce wrestle to clinch the specials awards in school and mighty grabbing of all the A's there can be. It's like it'd kill without straight A's.

You can call me a "nationalist", I don't care. (My colleague gave me that term. I prefer to believe I'm a nationalist - the patriotic kind.) There's just this part of me which wants to yell it out loud. How am I to tolerate this when I step back into the school come July?

On Good Leadership

I had a chat with a manager from another team in the organisation. And I realised the importance of good leadership in driving the members of the team in their work and in creating a strong and open culture.

A leader with a vision and the ability to drive the team to greater heights fosters unity in the team and a sharing and learning environment. With that, the people under him or her are able to find motivation, drive and passion in their work. There would not be the mundaneness and the usual dread to come to work. It seems I have not felt that passion for sometime now.

I felt happy coming out of that chat. I have the ability to push for new frontiers and to make things happen. I can see some future in my future.

From this point onwards, life will only get more exciting.

Emotions

The pace at work has been quite stifling. Not that I find it hard to breathe, but because it is simply too slow! It is understandable, considering we have a new boss since the start of this year who has yet to give our team a clear direction forward. For me it isn’t so bad, I have my plans for the next half of the year, but I wonder how my teammates feel.

I’m again wondering how numbed to events I have become. I got into the course, which I thought was quite a feat given my less-than excellent mathematics results, but was not as elated as I expected upon receiving the news. Have I been taught not to harbor high hopes such that there are no expectations to match upon? Have the emotional undulations and the extremities that come with them been lost in me? Nevertheless, I have to find back the spirit of submitting and admitting to my true emotions.

Still, I feel the 1 month plus wait is kinda long. Can't wait to wear that band on my finger and to be more integral in his life!

Embarking on a new journey

I'll be back to school for a year, full-time, come July this year. It's going to be very tough with a lot of brain-cracking expected, but I've committed myself to put in all my best and not give up.

Apart from my lucky stars & my supportive sis, I really have to thank WW for believing in me and giving me the reassurance. He believed in me even at times when I didn't believe in myself.

I'm going to the temple this weekend. And will do my daimuku chanting. =)

Our Wedding Bands

To wear it, it requires commitment of a lifetime =)

In two months' time, it'll fit comfortably in the finger leading to my heart, being with me timelessly.

I miss my bed

I have a throbbing headache since I woke up this morning. I can feel my immunity going down with the slight itchiness in my throat and with the fatigue in my body. Am listening to Chopin’s Ballade in G minor, wishing I were lying on the bed, or at the piano playing the splendid piece.

We’ve been busier making arrangements and planning for the Big Event. We bought our wedding bands, much to our great satisfaction and joy. The rings come slightly steep-priced, but its comfort and weight are incomparable. After some frustration and with WW’s sis’ help, we managed to source for a hotel ballroom for the banquet. Oh, it’s all about 排场。

In a week’s time, I will know what to do with my future.

Uncertainty

I'm getting increasingly frustrated at the situation I'm in. While I would like things to be more certain so that I can plan ahead, things just seem to be so uncertain and looking somewhat disappointing. All my grand plans may just be smashed, but at least I have one great thing going good :) Perhaps it is meant to be for me to devote all attention and time to planning and executing this big event?

Just don't understand how come things seem to be going my way but in the end everything becomes tentative. Perhaps I should consult a fengshui master. And at the end of the day when I don't get what I am aiming for, I could be put in an embarrassing spot. Just gotta 隔开面子，厚着脸皮。有时做人要学会不要脸。Maybe it's meant for me to do my baking business?

Maybe's are dangling in the air.

About blings

It was a happy moment yesterday seeing my friend chose the significant big rock for his gf. Although he burnt a big hole in his pocket, he was both anticipative and happy after making the purchase. I was asked along to Larry Jewellery to do a direct comparison between my bling from Blue Nile and the one with the Lazare cut in Larry. He needed some internal persuasion and conviction to be sure he had got the best deal. Congrats to my friend and (especially) his fiancee-to-be!

Happy that WW is back from his work trip to Australia. It sure felt like a long while since he's been away but now that he's back in Singapore we can spend our precious weekends together again :) There is quite a lot on our agenda this weekend - hotels / restaurants recees!

An eventful day, with its goods and bads

At the end of the day, I'm feeling exhausted, both physically and mentally.

It does not necessarily mean it has been a bad day though. I spent very meaningful times with firstly, kids from MINDS (Movement of the Intellectually Disabled of Singapore), then with my parents and brother. I got to drive around too, but only a bit too excessively coz I had to travel all the way to NTU and back under the stuffy hot weather. (Doesn't matter that I was in the car with full air-con; the sunlight and weather affected me still.)

Was at Road Safety Park @ ECP with some of my colleagues, helping out kids from MINDS in knowing the rules of the road. However, as most of the kids have lower levels of awareness and understanding, we bent the rules to mingle with them and let them have fun on their go-karts and on legs instead. I was with this sweet little girl, Andrea, walking around the Road Safety Park. She was largely oblivious to the happenings around her and most of the time was walking around on her own, venturing onto the grass and heading towards the fences to be nearer to the sea. It took a while to know her style, like how she preferred you slinging an arm over her shoulder to grabbing her hand, and to know what she wanted. Often, she was so happy that she would start grinning and shaking her head and even hugged me once. A pity she could not think beyond her current level. Hope she grows up to be stronger and better.

Afternoon I drove my Papa Mama to NTU, first to have lunch with Shou Bi (dear Bro) and taking the chance to tour NTU, then to Nanyang Business School for an interview for MFE course. Ended up I was upset and worried about my future once again. My mathematics background was deemed not strong enough (compared to those 1st-class honours engineering students?) and the professors thought I might have to struggle in the course which is full of complex mathematics. Such a headache. Although I wanted the course quite badly, I wouldn't want to have perpetual headaches and stress on catching up on my maths with the other course mates too. Damn. Everything is so competitive. That's the result of 300+ people fighting hard for 40 available seats. And I thought my maths was solid. :(

The interview filled me with gloom for the rest of the day. After it, I didn't want to talk much. But still, we treasured the precious times together - Papa, Mama, me - with tea time at Serangoon Gardens food centre and more 兜风 along KJE and PIE. Driving can be quite tiring! By 5 pm I was half-dead physically and was dragging my feet.

So for now, I'll just keep my fingers crossed. There has been much uncertainties since the start of this year. I hope things turn out fine in the end.

And WW agrees we should start dinner-location-sourcing this weekend! Yippie! Again, keeping my fingers crossed on another uncertainty.

Daydreaming in the night

I spent the last two hours doing online research and selected my top 3 venues for each of our wedding events - solemnisation, wedding dinner and wedding outdoor lunch. I'm not revealing the list yet; WW has to agree to them first. :) Glad he left most of the wedding decisions to me. Now I get to choose the few choices I like then let him narrow down. Didn't know it could be so fun working towards a dream.

Earlier this evening Tian accompanied me to the Starry Starry Wedding event at Fort Canning, The Legends. They showcased their outdoor wedding setup as well as the bridal dresses, Tianpo jewellery and wedding photography. Tian and I liked the outdoor setting for its offer of scenery, but I thought it was not special enough and might not be too comfortable for a lunch reception. So I would say then The Legends is not in my list of Tops.

No worries, this is not going to turn out to be the wedding blog! Coz I'll have more updates on other areas of my life soon. :)

烈日当空

Being an white-collared executive for 3.5 years, I've gotten used to the air-conditioning at the workplace, at least 8 hours a day for all the work days. I used to miss the days when I got to soak in the sun, anytime of the day as I wished. But now I'm resigned to fate. Rather than lamenting on being couped up in an artificial environment, I make use of the weekends to do some outdoor activities.

Yesterday during lunch it was super hot and sunny with the sun rays beating down hard on you. I was running around a few places and took a long walk to Circular Road (from Shenton Way) for lunch. At the end of lunch break I was back in office with a bad headache. :( What harm has the sedentary office lifestyle done to our bodies?

Count to 10 before you lash out in anger

Very often, it is not what you say that will make your partner angry - it is how you say it. Whenever you feel challenged in a situation, step back and count to 10 before continuing the argument. This gives you time to compose yourself and think things through.

I regretted saying the mean things in a fit of anger and in self-deluded vengeance before completely understanding the situation. I blamed the man for not giving clear directions and leaving me in a state of uncertainty - was it for real and are we moving forward? Aren't we supposed to? All evil thoughts snowballed into a mass; it hit the victim quite badly.

We spent more time sorting out the mess of thoughts and feelings. It turned out there were other priorities in his mind that have to be cleared for the big event. (Spell: finances.) The biggest worry and headache for to-be-wed couples and subsequently, for married couples and families. To me finances ain't too much of a worry as I have some savings and expect nothing more than a simple wedding. To the man, expectations on himself are higher, both self-imposed and family-induced. I suppose a man's responsibilities are still greater than those of a woman's, though I do not believe it has to be so.

The outburst served as an apt reminder, at a most appropriate time where things could go either way. Frustrations could potentially build up or, as long as things have been discussed through and agreed upon, mutual understanding could be reached. Now I know better than to allow my negatives thoughts feast on themselves and grow. I re-learn the importance of standing in the other's shoes, seeing in all perspectives. Thoroughly exercising the big word "Understanding". To approach things in a non-confrontational way and in a manner that allows conducive discussions.

There is much to learn. Thank you Nan Ren for giving me the time, the chance and the love to learn.

Good news!

Happy to hear that another of my friend cum classmate from JC class is expecting! Congrats ger. :)

If I could arrange, I would want to have a BB now too so that it would be an easier delivery and my little one could grow up to be a big boy / girl earlier. Then perhaps by age 35 I can take life easier. But such things can’t be rushed and planned as wished, so I’m enjoying my own life now and will concentrate on building a strong marriage first. Besides, having a baby would consume too much of my personal time. I’m still too selfish to share my personal time at this point in time. Just hope my body can 真气到三十出。

Wanna thank my friends for sharing my happiness. I may not be as ready as should be, but I guess it takes time to accept that such a big change is going to happen in your life.

Our special milestone

A surprise awaited me on Friday evening; I was slowly laid into the Grand Plan without the least bit of suspicion! WW is real good :)

Although we have been talking about it for a bit since late last year, the reality has not quite set in yet. But now that the ring is sitting comfortably on my finger, we have got to remind ourselves that yes, we're walking into another phase of our lives together from this moment on.

The special moment was painstakingly created by WW, first with the order of the sparkling bling from US and the stressful tracking of the shipping status, then the incarnation of the grand idea for a surprise to throw me. There was also the rushing to get all the other stuff ready for the occasion and the bouquet of roses. I was very pleasantly surprised with all the efforts and planning done as he has been very busy with work recently too. Admired most of his courage to pop the question as it meant a major commitment in his life. Even as a lady (albeit a freedom-loving one), I am slightly intimidated with having to engage lifelong commitment to my partner. To a guy, this act would have been a significant one.

To WW: Thank you for being my man. Even though I may still feel like a stranger in this new stage of our lives together, I am ready to put in whatever it takes to make it a strong, lasting and engaging marriage. I understand that at some point, going into a marriage must have scared you too. Don't worry coz we're walking down this path together and have each other's support. I may not have expressed all that I feel at that special moment, but we both know some things need not be spoken.

Thinking back, I would very much like to have a surprise planned for WW then too. But I was expecting it to be a few weeks later in April. WW has gotten that laid out well too coz then the surprise would be even greater had I not expected it!

忙忙碌碌

Somehow I can’t get to start my work engine this morning. Just three weeks ago I was unduly worried about my existence in the company, fearing I might have become irrelevant – not enough work cut out for me? But today I feel the pressure of mounting workload, again. Perhaps our unit gets a kick out of drowning staff.

Nevertheless, I’m not letting work affect my mood. This is going to be a busy week. Mon – gym; Tue – dinner with classmates from Deustche klass; Wed – drinking with colleagues; Thu – Wellness Village; Fri – dating day. I may have to skip yoga this week. From next week onwards, if we go according to plan, I’ll start on my golf lessons which consume Mon and Thu for the next five weeks.

充实人生，忙碌也快乐！

Change in weather

The change from sunny to rainy has made some activities during the day undo-able. Wanted to bring Summer out for a walk at Bishan Park but the rain has spoilt our plans. However, we took the chance to catch forty winks. Now I'm going to do some online shopping - VS!

为何？

Can't help feel disappointed by his loftiness and self-absorption. It doesn't hurt to show a little concern. You have to know the priorities in life; some things done at the right time proves so much more.

It doesn't help even if you drop by but your heart and mind are elsewhere. If you prefer to relieve your mind-bogs by flipping the magazine, do that at home. You always keep your thoughts to yourself, staying silent while choosing to believe I prefer silence too.

Somehow I can't imagine how living, during the workdays, with you will be like.

Sigh.

心里的痛，从哪儿掏？

There's this bug in the office!

It’s uncomfortably cold in the office since this morning. Maybe it is the clouds and haze blocking out the sunshine that keeps us warm. My fingers are frosty and a sense of unwell is creeping in. Have popped in a vitamin C pill to build up my immunity and a panadol to keep my growing headache at bay. I’m keeping my fingers crossed.

I have this strong urge again to move on to new fields. :p

Dad's love

Seems like this is a good lunar year ahead. I'm feeling happier and more positive as the days go by. :)

Last night I was rubbing the big blue-black on my ankle and recalled those days in PGP when my ex of two weeks helped me rubbed those taekwondo-induced blue-blacks. wahaha. But of coz I was quick to redeem myself with recounts of the finger and back massages my dear NR gives me.

This morning dad woke up early to make breakfast for sis and me. He had the teh and half-boiled eggs all ready for us. Recalled those primary and secondary school days when Apa used to make breakfast for us too before sending us to school. It has been a long long while since we get to enjoy Dad's breakfast love, especially after we went to University and led lives of our own in hostels. Apa has started on his breakfast "endeavour" after seeing me complain about not having teabags at home during those few days I was on MC in the past weeks.

Apa cares a lot for us. When we were young, he tended to our fevers by waking up at intervals in the night and early morning to replace the warm towels on our foreheads and to pop us with panadols. He also fetched us to school every morning; that time while we were in Maha Bodhi it was all the way from Bedok to Old Airport Road area. He's the kind of strong and silent dad. And it's sweet how he played with my hair, albeit a little subconsciously, at my aunt's place during CNY. Hee.

I must be crazy!

Craving for a Coach wallet, despite getting a new wallet from a dear friend for birthday. Crazy me!

This has all the necessary compartments I need - 10 credit card slots, an ID window, 2 bill slots and an external coin pocket which I can choose not to use. Only thing is it is in white which I may not be able to maintain very clean for long.
This is close to perfect! Only if it's not a black-skinned interior. It has the same number of pockets and slots as the first.

Pockets seems insufficient. But the whiteness is nice too.

Fougasse

During my spare time today, I tried a simple bread recipe using baker cum author Richard Bertinet's kneading technique. This fougasse, made with white dough and very simply nothing else, tasted like the crusty tip of a French loaf. Hard crispy crust, I like. But it may be a little too hard for the less solid teethed. =P

Almost identical to the one made by the author!

How to make the best out of a precious day?

Today's what I deem a superb-weather day - the sun is bright and sunny, winds gusty yet there are with some light clouds. The perfect weather to do outdoor activities or just lie on the grass fields looking at the sky.

Furthermore, it's a Sunday. Just the right day to do some lazing, soul-searching and resting.

I often wonder if what I'm doing at the moment most fulfills my soul's desire. I wonder if there is something that makes my heart leap and makes me feel like I'm living both in the moment and in eternity. Imagine dancing around in vast green patches, speeding down a highway in the convertible with the sun overhead, standing at a cliff's edge looking down at the communities below you, flying like a bird in the air. Some part of me is secretly yearning to live those unforgettable moments.

But thinking back, I miss the winds blowing into my living room and the evening sun shining into my room, whenever I'm away from home for long. The place I often want to go back to is my home (and these days, 30 BD too) despite having lived here for 20 years.

To not waste a precious day is to live the current moment, appreciate the beauty of nature and things around you and not to worry about missing out on anything at all. Because the good things will remain or return.

(P.S. I'm still having a blocked nose and stuffed ears, a result of the flu since last Sunday. And I'm missing WW who has to work over this weekend and thus couldn't meet for these few days. Good thing we met on Valentine's. :))

Sick nottoz

My body is getting weaker, it seems. Just two weeks ago I was down with stomach flu and now I'm bugged with a serious common flu. The doctor gave me two days' MC to rest at home and with pills to cure my runny nose, cough and dissolve my phlegm. I'm not able to attribute this to work, coz workload has reduced since start of the year. Could it then be a result of more worries of the uncertainties ahead? Or am I the workaholic who breaks down when deprived of the challenges and stress at work?

Nevertheless, I'm happy to have enjoyed the CNY festivities. We did not do a lot of house-visiting, but instead spent quality time with family and loved ones. On the first lunar day, WW came over and drove me to Changi Airport T3 to celebrate my birthday with the slices of Patissier cakes we bought the day before. On the second day, I went over to his house to bai nian and caught 长江七号 with him, his sister, cousins and uncle. (And I cried a little during the show when 周星驰"died"; can you imagine I'm so prone to tears now?) On Sat we went to 观音庙 then back home for a round of mahjong with WW, Tian and Mr. RK. On Sun WW accompanied me to Parkway Parade where I got two bread-making books. Then we went to East Coast Park for kite-flying. It's a simple yet happy date. :)